Friday, September 24, 2010

Player Profile Special Edition- The Flotsam and Jetsam

Haven't done one of these in a while, and I thought before I start with the next batch of players as well as the newer crop of players that have been stalwarts in the last few years. I thought I might take a moment to remember those who blew through our little game, and the memories that they left behind.....some were great, some were jerks, some are only referred to by their physical descriptions....here we go!!!

1. Scot Mills- I wanted to start with Scot, because he was an every week kind of man for a long time, way before Satch showed up, and he always had the enthusiasm of a tiger, with the competitiveness to match. He rode his motorcycle, with a baseball bat hanging out of his bag, usually wearing some sort of rock and roll T-shirt. Played outfield mostly, known for taking some strange routes to the ball, but got better as he played more. I think he ended up with a work schedule and a girlfriend that impeded his Sunday's. Best: Always a lively expletive laden rant after he hit a ground ball, while he was running down the line.

2. Ryo- Japanese player, kicked ass. Went on to play college ball I think. We were a bit in awe. Best- Guy could do it all.

3. The Pacific Rim Contingent- These guys I think were acquaintances of Ryo, but stayed longer than he did. They varied from very serious to very un-serious....But they always seemed to have a good time, and had some real fancy uniforms. Also were into the post-game workout, complete with sprints and calisthenics. And they brought out a bunch of giggling Japanese girls to watch us. It was the most fans we ever had. Best- The goofy guy in basketball short, soccer cleats and bleached hair who ran around in a circle in right field for most of a game.

4. Eli- Hoooooboy, was this kid a piece of work. High school kid, lefty pitcher, who saw our game as a good way to get a workout. He used us for what he wanted, and left when he was done with us. Real bad attitude, which can sort of be excused by his age, but what a dick. It all culminated in a game that Satch was pitching in which Eli took at least 30 pitches. For some reason I couldn't get that 3rd strike, and by the 4th count, I told him that he could just walk if he wanted to. He snarled at me, and then eventually fouled out to third. I started throwing him lob balls to piss him off. I should have hit him. Never saw him again, or I would have given him some chin music. Best- He once pitched 3 innings and then left the game, stating he had "done his job".

5. Team USA- This guy forced his girlfriend to come out, and then berated her for not watching him play closely enough. I guess he still comes around from time to time. Best- Haven't seen him lately.

6. White T-shirt on White T-shirt with Necklace guy- This guy was walking around and asked if he could play. We said sure. He was pretty pumped. He was in full gansta gear and was sliding all over the place. I think we were all worried about his $200 shoes that he was messing up in the dirt. Best- He slid into third, with both feet in front, on his ass, then jumped up to take home, after straightening his gear.

7. James- James has to be thanked first for getting us hooked up with the San Quentin game, although our first game, he insisted on pitching, and pitch he did, into a 15 run deficit. He was balking, and throwing the ball away, and walking people all over the place, and refused to be taken out. He also batted himself in the clean up spot. Struck out. A lot. Best- He would ride to the game in a bike with one of those children carriages on the back, but with no kid. Creepy. He also enjoyed getting his three innings of pitching work in, and then leaving the game. He also would show up after being gone for 6 months and demand to start on the mound. Maybe its a lefty thing?

8. Tim- Tim also should get special recognition since he still shows up from time to time. But always around the 5th inning. Tim disappeared for a couple of years and came back a little bigger, and with a hell of an improvement in his hitting. Don't know how he did it, but if gaining weight is the way to do it, I should be hitting .850 by now. Best- Tim is a very nice guy, and we love it when he shows up, just wish it was more often, and on time.

9. Dan Phillips- Dan was from Cincinnati, if you couldn't deduce that from the several Reds jerseys that he wore to the games. We have him to thank for some of the pictures that we have displayed on the blog, and Dan was a real stand up guy. He might even still track us, I know he enjoyed playing ball more than anything in his time here in SF. Great infield player, and decent pitcher and solid contact hitter, I remember his first day out he hit a double and a triple off of me. He claimed that I should have never thrown him a fastball, because that was the only pitch of mine that he would swing at. Best- Dan lived with Doc and my buddy Rob, and I heard that he experienced his first earthquake on the crapper. Rough one.

10. Rob- This one pisses me off, I have known this guy for 21 years, and when he didn't live in the city, he would talk about how cool it would be if he moved to SF and could play baseball. Then he moved here. And.....I think he has played about 10 times, if that, including winning game one of the July 4th doubleheader a few years ago. He also almost killed Johnny Bartlett by not catching a thrown ball to third. I know he likes playing, but getting him to actually come out is damn near impossible. He claims that if we started earlier he would play, but by 3 pm on Sunday, he is "getting ready for the week." What? In any case, I wish he would play more, because he is a good player, and he is my friend. He plays kickball on Thursdays, so maybe if the MBC got some slutty drunk girls to play more regularly, Rob might show up. Anybody know any of those? Best- Rob, in high school, once took over pitching in the 1st inning, after our catcher broke our pitchers nose with a errant throw. He pitched the whole game, including striking out future MLB player Toby Hall. We won the game, and for some reason, the coaches never let him pitch again. That is known as Rob's Luck.

11. The Hobo- Man, I miss this guy. There used to be this hobo who watched our games at the Marina field, and he would drink, and lay in the sun, scratching his belly. Occasionally he would offer some advice, or yell at someone who made a mistake. Before I started playing, he coaxed Greg into throwing him some batting practice after a game. Greg agreed and then (by mistake) beaned the guy on the first pitch. Apparently he started to charge the mound, then thought better, and stopped and laughed. Best- He had some great drunken insults. And he and his cronies used to drag a TV to the Marina on Super Bowl Sunday to watch the game, because there was an open power outlet in the stands.

12. Carlos a.k.a "Gordo"- This guy was kicked out of the Mexican league for being too fat (that's where he got the nickname) and not caring enough. He was nice enough, and he could swing a bat, but man, was he lazy. He would half bend for ground balls, then just give up and look the other way. He got a job as a security guard, and then got shot apparently. We never found out if he was stopping the robbery or participating. Best- He tried to pitch once, and that really didn't work out. His pants kept falling down during his follow through.

13. Dennis- First off, Dennis is really impressive, because the guy is in his 60's and he is in excellent shape. He also holds some sort of record for donating blood. However, he constitutes that sort of player who in the course of a game, focuses on the faults of others more than focusing on his own skill set. He also enjoys shit talking in the batter's box, something I don't recommend, unless you can back it up with your bat or your fists. Luckily, our game isn't that serious, but still, not the thing you want a lot of. He also wants to pitch a lot, and when he does, it's a real hitters jamboree. I admire the desire, but sometimes it is not what the game needs. I hit a ball off him once with Krakatoa that I think went 500 feet. Best- Dennis sports the short baseball pants, short socks, bare leg in the middle look. Bold. Perhaps he is ahead of the curve, and we shall all look that way in a few years. Or not.

13. And to finish, some players that are dangerously close to being added to this list, unless they start showing up again. And don't give me any excuses: Zerbes, The Bhatia Brothers (Vinay, you have NO excuse!), Nick Levine, Casey, Doug N., Danny C., Dan M., Keefe, Owen, Paul, Phil, Sean S., Ryan, Oliver, Jason P, I could go on, but you get the message.

Well, hope you enjoyed this trip down memory lane. Its the same game, and you know how to get there. You just have to want to be there. And click your heels three times and say, "There's no place like the MBC game on Sundays........"


S. Paige

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